Hi

     So i kinda read some of my old posts,i normally don't read them, 'Cause the words just flow at an emotional time, you can actually see that by how conflicted these posts are ,haha.
I might not be very good at this,and maybe my english kinda suck too, but sometimes you feel like there are some dark feelings that gets to you and keeps spinning in your head wanting to come out,and talking to someone never helps,no matter how close some one is and no matter how much they show you that they're there for you, there will always be something that is bigger than your problem,or you can talk for hours and the subject would change in seconds leaving you with this stupid feeling and regrets about opening your mouth at the first place..
So yea whoever is reading this "doubt it",thank you baha. 

It might've been different.

Laying on your bed at night,thinking about what could've gone right.. And what if only you've appreciated yourself more .. 

You keep thinking that everything is Always too good for you,keep letting the closest of all hurt  you and correct their mistakes yourself 'cause you know deep inside its for your own good so you wont be lonely, and you keep postponing those awful feelings just to get through the night... 

What if you grew to have more self respect,what if you woke up everyday feeling that someone is actually blessed to have you, what if you knew you were that good enough, will this path change?

Checking yourself in the mirror and thinking about all the good things that've been destroyed  in you, a perfect personality? A thicker hair? Lol

A better future? 

And the problem is you know exactly how to  correct everything... But yet you don't move  a finger and you always accept less than you deserve,postpone the way you feel and destroy what you have left just for the sake of not feeling a certain dark feelings you kept avoiding..

But i always end up being alone surprisingly, so what is it about then?